Is It Cheating? Find Your Line Together
Liking an ex’s old photos at 2am. A secret inside joke with a coworker. A dating app you “just browse.” Answer cheating or not cheating for each one, then see if your partner agrees.
- 1Pick a deck and type both names.
- 2Player 1 answers cheating or not cheating for every scenario, then hands the phone over.
- 3Player 2 answers the same scenarios. You see exactly where your lines differ.
All 90 questions
Where's the Line?
Boundary Negotiation
- Is it cheating to do something your partner explicitly said would hurt them, even if you personally believe it is harmless?
- Is it cheating to follow an old agreement you know your partner now feels differently about without checking in again?
- Is it cheating to keep a dating app installed only for matches and validation, with no intention of meeting anyone?
- Is it cheating to agree to a boundary you privately plan to ignore because you think it is unreasonable?
- Is it cheating to use different rules for yourself and your partner when it comes to flirting?
- Is it cheating to accept an expensive personal gift from someone who has openly said they want more than friendship?
- Is it cheating to keep testing the edge of a boundary without technically crossing the exact rule?
- Is it cheating to redefine what happened so it sounds more acceptable when you tell your partner?
- Is it cheating to dance or behave with someone on a trip in a way you would immediately stop if your partner walked into the room?
- Is it cheating to continue a behavior after learning that your partner experiences it as a serious breach of trust?
- Is it cheating to ask friends to judge whether a boundary is 'normal' instead of discussing why it matters to your partner?
- Is it cheating to maintain a playful flirt-message streak because 'it is just a joke' even though both people enjoy the tension?
Just a Friend?
Friends & Online Lines
- Is it cheating to have a celebrity hall pass you're dead serious about?
- Is it cheating to have a secret inside joke with a coworker?
- Is it cheating to follow accounts of people you find hot?
- Is it cheating to always save a seat for the same cute coworker?
- Is it cheating to slow dance with a friend at a wedding?
- Is it cheating to share a secret with a friend but not your partner?
- Is it cheating to have a 'work spouse' you text after hours?
- Is it cheating to dress up more when a certain someone will be there?
- Is it cheating to have a best friend you talk to more than your partner?
- Is it cheating to keep texting someone who flirts, if you never flirt back?
- Is it cheating to vent about your partner to a friend with a crush on you?
- Is it cheating to have a crush you never act on?
Ex Files
Exes & the Past
- Is it cheating to keep a hoodie your ex left behind?
- Is it cheating to still listen to a playlist your ex made you?
- Is it cheating to keep photos of your ex on your phone?
- Is it cheating to watch your ex's stories every day?
- Is it cheating to like your ex's new photos?
- Is it cheating to stay in a group chat with your ex?
- Is it cheating to wish your ex a happy birthday?
- Is it cheating to reread old texts from your ex?
- Is it cheating to have lunch with an ex and not mention it?
- Is it cheating to tell your ex about problems in your relationship?
- Is it cheating to still say 'love you' to an ex as a friend?
- Is it cheating to keep your ex as a 'what if' in the back of your mind?
Screen Time Secrets
Digital & Social Media Boundaries
- Is it cheating to like old photos of an ex on Instagram late at night?
- Is it cheating to keep a dating app installed 'just to browse,' even though you're in a relationship?
- Is it cheating to slide into a stranger's DMs to compliment their looks?
- Is it cheating to delete messages from your phone before your partner can see them?
- Is it cheating to follow someone you find attractive on a private, secret social media account?
- Is it cheating to sext someone you met online 'just for fun,' with no plans to ever meet?
- Is it cheating to watch porn that features someone who looks exactly like your ex?
- Is it cheating to keep your dating profile status as 'single' even though you're taken?
- Is it cheating to message an ex 'happy birthday' without mentioning it to your partner?
- Is it cheating to save a crush's contact under a fake or coded name?
- Is it cheating to spend hours texting a coworker about things you never tell your partner?
- Is it cheating to keep a flirty group chat alive that your partner doesn't know exists?
Grey Area Gestures
Physical Boundaries & Real-World Behavior
- Is it cheating to get a massage alone from someone you find attractive?
- Is it cheating to dance close with someone else at a party while your partner isn't there?
- Is it cheating to kiss someone on the cheek 'goodbye' a little too long?
- Is it cheating to go to dinner alone with an ex 'just to catch up'?
- Is it cheating to hold hands briefly with someone else during a group hangout, as a joke?
- Is it cheating to lie about where you were, even though nothing happened?
- Is it cheating to flirt with a bartender or waiter for free drinks or better service?
- Is it cheating to take a weekend trip alone with a friend you're secretly attracted to?
- Is it cheating to cuddle with a friend 'platonically' during a movie night?
- Is it cheating to hide a friendship from your partner because you know it would make them uncomfortable?
- Is it cheating to give or accept a lap dance at a bachelor/bachelorette party?
3AM Group Chat
Gaming & Late-Night Chats
- Is it cheating to send memes to one person all day, every day?
- Is it cheating to text someone 'good morning' every single day?
- Is it cheating to watch a series 'together' over text with someone else?
- Is it cheating to decline your partner's call during a late-night chat?
- Is it cheating to send someone a song that 'reminds you of them'?
- Is it cheating to share a Spotify Blend with someone you have a crush on?
- Is it cheating to pin someone's chat above your partner's?
- Is it cheating to keep texting someone after saying goodnight to your partner?
- Is it cheating to have a crush on a streamer you watch every night?
- Is it cheating to roleplay a romance with someone in an online game?
- Is it cheating to swap long voice notes with someone every day?
- Is it cheating to delete a chat so your partner won't see it, even if it's innocent?
Secret Stash
Money Secrets
- Is it cheating to have a secret savings account?
- Is it cheating to hide a big purchase from your partner?
- Is it cheating to keep paying for your ex's streaming account?
- Is it cheating to lie to your partner about your salary?
- Is it cheating to open a secret credit card?
- Is it cheating to send your ex money when they're struggling?
- Is it cheating to cover your ex's dinner when you run into them?
- Is it cheating to tip a streamer more than you spend on date night?
- Is it cheating to buy pricey gifts for a coworker you're close to?
- Is it cheating to spend your shared savings without asking?
- Is it cheating to send money to someone you only know online?
Vacation Rules
Trips & Temptation
- Is it cheating to take a romantic sunset photo with a stranger?
- Is it cheating to flirt with a bartender abroad 'because it doesn't count'?
- Is it cheating to go on a group trip when your ex is coming too?
- Is it cheating to let a tour guide flirt with you all week?
- Is it cheating to plan a trip with a friend you have a crush on?
- Is it cheating to take a friend on the trip you promised your partner?
- Is it cheating to share a hotel room with a friend you once dated?
- Is it cheating to skinny-dip with friends while your partner's at home?
What counts as cheating depends on the couple
Few couples ever sit down and define cheating. Most assume they agree, until one of them follows someone they find attractive or keeps their ex’s hoodie. Micro-cheating, emotional affairs and online flirting are gray areas where reasonable people draw different lines.
Talking about it in the abstract is much easier than after something has happened. A game turns a heavy topic into a set of concrete scenarios you can disagree about calmly. A few scenarios mention sexting, porn and physical contact, but nothing on this page is explicit.
Boundaries vs. control
Agreeing on boundaries together is healthy: you each say what would hurt you and decide what you’re both comfortable with. Control is different. A partner who demands your passwords, tracks your location, checks your phone without asking or tells you who you can be friends with isn’t setting a boundary, and no answer in this game makes that okay.
If you feel unsafe or controlled, talk to someone you trust. In the US you can reach the National Domestic Violence Hotline 24/7 at 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.
Which deck to start with
Where’s the Line? is about agreements and how they change over time. Just a Friend? covers coworkers, crushes and who you follow, and Ex Files is about what you keep from past relationships. Screen Time Secrets and 3AM Group Chat cover likes, DMs, dating apps and late-night chats. Grey Area Gestures is about physical gray areas like a slow dance or a goodbye kiss on the cheek, Vacation Rules is about trips, and Secret Stash is about money kept from a partner.
Play the full version in Floom
This page holds 8 decks. The Floom app has 300+ quizzes in six formats: This or That, Would You Rather, Never Have I Ever, Who’s Most Likely, Is It Cheating and Red Flag or Green Flag. You each answer on your own iPhone, the results open together, and you get stats after every round. You can also write your own quizzes and answer a new daily question together.
Questions
What is micro-cheating?
Small behaviors that aren’t physical but cross a line your partner cares about, like hiding a conversation, flirting in DMs or keeping a dating profile active. Whether something counts depends on what the two of you agree on.
Is texting an ex cheating?
It depends on the couple, which is why it’s worth asking. The Ex Files deck puts scenarios like this side by side so you can see each other’s answer.
Is this game free?
Yes. Everything on this page is free and needs no sign-up. The Floom app is free to download too, and Floom Pro unlocks the full library of 300+ quizzes.